Break ups can be very painful, especially after a long-time relationship. We have all been there, and everyone knows that it’s hard to let go of all those memories. But sometimes you just have to. Here is a list of things that you can do in order to make you journey easier and get over a breakup.
This is the first and most important step in getting over an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. Even though you decide to remain friends at the end of the relationship, you still need time to heal. However childish this may seem, you need to distance yourself. This also includes unfollowing or muting them on social media. If problems arose by you doing this, you just need to communicate that you need some space. This is completely normal, and you have the right to do it.
Being single doesn’t have to be a bad thing. When you are in a relationship, a lot of your time is dedicated to couple activities or a well-known routine, but when you are single, all that times transforms into you time. If you ever had something that you wanted to try, now is the time to do it. By doing this, you will not only discover yourself, but you will boost your self esteem and independence. Plus, the options are endless. You can start travelling, gardening, join a book club, play sports, do theatre, puzzles and so on. There are truly no limitations.
Most people rely on their significant other to make them feel good, but now that they are not here anymore, you can do that by yourself. Indulge yourself some fast food, watch your favourite shows, go on vacation with some friends, have a spa day, buy yourself a gift, or simply spend a day laying around, doing nothing. It can be as big or as small as you want, as long as it makes you happy.
Think about the relationship. But really think about it. Even though you have happy memories together, think about the things that have driven you apart. You may want to fix things, but sometimes you just have to accept that maybe the two of you were just not meant to be together. Examining the relationship and thinking about all the sad moments in it can help you realise that and see the bigger picture the way it really is.
In these kinds of moments, it is very important to be surrounded by supportive people. Cope in a healthy way! Spend time with your family and friends and talk about what you are going through. They may even have some advice or similar experiences that will help you in the long run. Just be being there and listening to what you have to say, they remind you that you are not alone, and they justify your feelings.
During a breakup, your brain is more attracted to sad music. So, let it! When you hear an artist that puts into lyrics your exact thoughts and emotions, that is further proof that you are not alone. Moreover, a study has recently shown that sad music can actually make you more peaceful. It can also make you cry, which even if it doesn’t seem like it, is exactly what you are looking for because it can make your mood bust. So, go ahead and listen to that breakup playlist on repeat!
You don’t want this breakup to negatively impact your future relationships, so you need to let go of the past. This is very hard, especially if you broke up on less then amicable terms. Even though you might want to hold a grudge against them for this, the healthy way is to let go. Give yourself the time to heal and forgive you and forgive yourself. Don’t harbour regret and hostility towards your ex-partner, this can only contribute to feelings of depression any anxiety, and it’s just not worth it. Choose the healthy way and move on.
Breaking up with someone doesn’t mean that the love instantly goes away. Whether it has been a few years or a few months since the breakup, it is okay to still have feeling for them. You have happy memories together that will always remain. However, a relationship needs more than just love. If you truly love someone, you wish the best for them, and sometimes that means breaking up.
Studies have shown that people who get into a new relationship tend to be happier than the ones who remain single for long periods of time. However, bear in mind that the rebounds in this study took place at about 7 months after the initial breakup. Therefore, even though it’s important to take you time and heal before moving on, you need to stay open to new possibilities. You never know who you are going to meet next and you shouldn’t turn away another relationship just because you are hung up on your ex.
Some people tend to lash out, either at friends that have said something triggering, or even just because their overwhelming emotions. Try to act like an adult in these situations and avoid making a scene. Writing your thoughts in a journal may be helpful to you, and you will be less likely to drown your sorrows in things like alcohol and drugs.
It’s a natural reaction to act like nothing happened and push our feelings down. During a breakup, there are a lot of negative emotions to deal with: pain, confusion, frustration, the worry that you are not good enough, the fear that you may never be happy again. All these things that we’re feeling are very frightening. However, we need to acknowledge them in order to heal and move on. Take your time to cry and mope, but don’t let the negative emotions consume you.
Some people are able to deal with a breakup on their own, but most need additional support. This is natural and, especially if you start feeling depressed, you need to seek help immediately. Talking will most likely help you cope with the breakup and help you move on faster.
Especially if you too used to live together, your home will start to remind you of them. So redecorate! If can be as simple as switching the sofa and the armchairs around, or as complicated as changing the colours or different rooms. And if a specific thing is just too painful to look at, don’t be afraid to throw it away. This is a time of change in your life and no one will judge you for it.
Break ups suck, but they aren’t the end of the world. Remember that there are a lot of things to do out there and that you now have the time to do them. Spend time with friends, go to a party, enjoy some tasty food. There are no limitations to what you can do anymore!
Whether it was your decision or your partners to end the relationship, you need to respect that. When you are in this position, it can be easy to neglect the bad parts of the relationship and see only the happy memories but getting back together is not a good idea. Move froward with your like and allow them to do the same. This is the healthy way to do things.
Breakups are always hard, but they aren’t impossible to get through! Give yourself time, and eventually you will recover. You don’t have to follow these tips, as everyone is different, but one thing remains the same. You need to do things that make you and only you happy. Don’t forget to love you first and surround yourself with others that see and appreciate you for who you are. Relationships fail all the time. It is not your fault and it’s normal to make errors from time to time. Instead of thinking about your ex, think about your future boyfriend or girlfriend. Think about how happy the two of you will be in the future. And never settle for less than you deserve. Good luck!